Trail Trash #116

I’m back! This was my first Hash since “the accident.” What accident you ask? Well, I spent a few days in Michigan and got a little over ambitious on the water skis and yard sailed big time folding myself in half backwards. Pretty much fucked up my back and right ankle. At the same time, CBT and I have been mourning the loss of our best friend Guinness. He passed away at the ripe old age of 13.

Anywho, I thought we should give it a shot and besides, I needed to see Cooter as there has been no beer in the kegerator for a couple weeks! We started not far from Cooters office next to the Tennessee Garage adjacent to the American Legion parking lot that warned of towing 24/7. Cooter was our hare and we had a visitor: Little Shit who is a travel nurse and has hashed with more kennels then me! Now that is whoring around!!!

Sticky showed up as did Twat Do I smell and Cooter Hog was off but not before confessing he had not scouted shit! After a quick Hi, My Name is Joe, we gave chase eventually catching up to Cooter for a beer at a bar across from the court house. Pabst on tap. Chacha yumyum! He was off again and as we gave chase once again, CBT and Sticky had it out in the parking lot. Seems she did not believe his cock was as big as he said and he wanted to prove it with a “Father Nelson” a term I was not even familiar with. Seemed like CBT enjoyed it though!

A few minutes later, Sticky spied the hare below the Unum lot and we attempted to cut him off by the usual boxing method. He had disappeared! Where you ask? Buffalo Wild Wings? Hare of the Dog? Hell no! He surprised everyone by ducking into Chilis! No one guessed it but we enjoyed another cold one there after solving that puzzle!

Cooter was off again. He led us back towards home and was nearly snared again. In fine hare fashion, rather then take the snare (or take the pussy way out by laying a Re-Group) he ducked into the Cigar Bar and we all enjoyed yet another draft and a shot of Bullet Bourbon – Thanks to Twat for picking up the tab on this one!!!

Cooter was off again. He led us back by the start and left evidence of autoharing around the corner to his office where we circled.

I was back to led circle and divvied out the downdowns.

Hare – Cooter Hog

FRB – Sticky Banana

FBI – Little Shit

DFL – Twat Do I Smell

Visitor – Little Shit from everywhere!

Backsliders – CBT and Hugh

Auto Haring – Cooter

And of course some other violations – Twat busted ass cumming off a ten foot wall behind Chilis (he was like a ton of bricks and suffered for it!); Little Shit assaulted me with her mug at the start; Little Shit was weather forecasting and bared all to prove it; the Hare left a True Trail arrow on a YBF; and Twat drank for forcing politics on all of us. There was some more impromptu down-downs and some skin before we swung low and hit Mello Mushroom for beers, football and fuud!

Come on out October 5 for Hash #117! We need hounds!!!!!!!!

Hugh Heifer, RA/Scribe/Backslider/Broke Back Hasher