Chattanooga Hash House Harriers
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Chattanooga Hash House Harriers |
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| Saturday, September 18, 2004 - Little Athens | ||
Ah, the Olympics. Despite being a few
weeks later than the actual Olympics (our games somehow kept being delayed
due to failed drug tests), our homage to those great athletes took place
in Red Bank at Captain Fro Ranger and Shiggy Mama's house. With
Shiggy laying the family trail - actually, with Just Jack laying the
family trial - and Fro laying the hash run, lots of people were able to
have a good time. In attendance was ReRun McNally, Thunder Pony,
Hall Pass and if you can believe it, a virgin! Just John came and
joined the hash, with several others joining the family trail with Naked 4
Candy & Shiggy (Just Amy, another Just John, and someone from the FBI
whose name is so top secret I can't remember). Fro's original name
for the run - Cardio Nightmare Hell - was replaced by the Olympic
Committee, as being athletes, we should have been able to run the hills of
Red Bank and the sustained straight-aways (what's that about?) with no
problem. During the run it was determined that the City of Red Bank
must offer tax breaks to people if they have at least two dogs in their
yard, as every house was basically a kennel. The "half
down" (the halfway point; luckily not in distance as the first half
was super long) was at Holy Cross Bowler and Naked 4 Candy's place, where
Miller High Life flowed (but TP didn't like). All started after the
break, and while the family trail went who-knows-where, the hashers were
directed towards the Olympic Coliseum (the old Red Bank Middle School
Track), where the Olympic rings on the ground in chalk signaled Just John
(the hasher, not the family trailer) to open the bag he had been carrying
the entire run. Its contents? A baton and a note,
which explained the event: four person relay. Unfortunately it was
supposed to be a four person relay from six contestants, with the spare
two having to take a shot of Jagermeister. Unfortunately
(fortunately?) there was just enough, so the relay was run and the hashers
continued to their next stop as directed by the hare - Subway. Of
course, when four sweaty hashers arrive at Subway, the customers began to
get a little nervous, hoping either we'd leave or that Jared mofo would
come protect them. The hashers did all but look in the bread and the
peppers for clues: the bathrooms were checked, employees were asked, and
the building was circled more times than a liquor store being cased for a
robbery. Finally (we're talking at least five full minutes later
here, gang) Fro rolls up in the |
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